And the Award Goes to Olivia Bliss Wilkinson...

Third grade teacher Miss Moe passed out student awards on the last day of school.

Liv took the award for Excellent Effort. There was a time (not long ago) that Eric and I did not think this first born girl of ours would have received such an award to be truthful. Olivia is certainly bright but we have not always seen her as someone who stretches herself as much as we think she should (or maybe better put--as we would like).

It appears we've been sorely mistaken.

The joys of being the first born! Poor child of ours. Seriously.

Liv also received nearly all 4's (equivalent of A's) in "Effort" on her report card and again, we were so incredibly impressed with her. Good grades matter for sure but GREAT grades in effort, teamwork, and social skills now that is what matters most here at Wilkinson Manor. And our Liv blossomed across the board.

Next week Olivia moves on to "team" level at her gymnastics academy. It was hard earned. Not that it took much to receive the green light to move forward from her pre-team coach who trained her for the past year but she certainly did have to make an impression on her tough to crack parents.

She needed to joyfully go to class, work hard at all the skills, and show us that she could be committed to training 9 hours a week. Without any complaints.

She did it. Beautifully.

Look out Fellow Future Olympians, Ivy League Pals, and Hollywood--Olivia Bliss Wilkinson's star is rising! And her parents couldn't be more proud.

Pop Star on Patrol

Olivia and her closest buds were selected to be on Brookside Elementary's "Patrol" squad next year. Incoming fourth, fifth, and sixth graders are chosen to help maintain order at school pick up and drop off. It is quite an honor and those who made the cut will proudly tell you, "Not everyone gets on Patrol."

After a video training session and seminar Olivia was ready to hit the pavement and get some hands on training.

I picked her up after patrol on day one and she bound into the car.

"It was awesome and I am sooo proud of myself. The best part? When I put on the vest I can write any one up for misconduct. I've already given Emmanuel a warning."

Be afraid, Brooksiders.

Here is Olivia and her dear friend and fellow patroler, Jewel, sharing celebratory popsicles.

The Byrds (the Bees) and The Mamas & The Papas

The Byrds

The talented band at my church played The Byrds "Turn, Turn, Turn" yesterday. It was a great reminder to me so I thought I'd share the link from The Byrds performing the song here as well as the lyrics for what it's worth. I hope you do steal a moment to listen to it as I believe it's a timeless message to absorb.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aNopQq5lWqQ

To everything (turn, turn, turn)

There is a season (turn, turn, turn)

And a time for every purpose, under heaven

A time to be born, a time to die

A time to plant, a time to reap

A time to kill, a time to heal

A time to laugh, a time to weep

To everything (turn, turn, turn)

There is a season (turn, turn, turn)

And a time for every purpose, under heaven

A time to build up,a time to break down

A time to dance, a time to mourn

A time to cast away stones, a time to gather stones together

To everything (turn, turn, turn)

There is a season (turn, turn, turn)

And a time for every purpose, under heaven

A time of love, a time of hate

A time of war, a time of peace

A time you may embrace, a time to refrain from embracing

To everything (turn, turn, turn)

There is a season (turn, turn, turn)

And a time for every purpose, under heaven

A time to gain, a time to lose

A time to rend, a time to sew

A time to love, a time to hate

A time for peace, I swear its not too late

The Mamas and The Papas

I spend a lot of time in church crying. And I go alone. I am sure the people around me think I am a wreck. The tears are not sad ones ever. I am so genuinely moved and tuned in during that 90 minutes each Sunday. Not only do I think my pastor is very bright, insightful, and as genuine as they come, I love the music (really--they are clearly somewhat "hip" to play The Byrds during Sunday service), and experiencing the connections of people around me is so lovely. Seeing moms and daughters with their heads resting on each other's shoulders. All ages, too. Teens and their moms. Mothers in their 60' and and daughters in their 40's. Dads and their kids holding hands and dads with their arms slung over the back of their son's chairs. Beautiful.

Blessed

One of my favorite church songs is Blessed Be Your Name.

These lyrics permeated my soul yesterday- it's easy for me to be grateful in the good times. I need to remember to trust and roll with the flow of life in the dark times, too.

Blessed be Your name

When the sun's shining down on me

When the world's 'all as it should be'

Blessed be Your name

Blessed be Your name

On the road marked with suffering

Though there's pain in the offering

Blessed be Your name

Finally, The Bees

Total tangent here---my 8 year old, Olivia, is really blossoming. Not just socially but physically (already). I've had to guide her through some of the physical feelings she is experiencing lately as her body grows, walk her down the deodorant aisle as she needs it now that she works out several hours a week at gymnastics sessions (I am so glad there are "safer" deodorants available nowadays for these developing bodies), and watch her as she so gently and skillfully took care of me the other afternoon. (I was sidelined with a migraine and had to take to my bed--she took care of Audrey, the dogs, and herself. Beautifully.)

Here is my special girl reading to our three year old class at Sunday School.

Here is a shot below of her little sis, Audrey, posing at the store the other day.

"Take a picture, mama. This will be for my album cover called, Faith of an Angel". ha! She posed a couple of times as you can see...

I hope to experience their heads on my shoulder and their hands in mine all the days of our lives.

My Cup Runneth Over

What a wonderful day. It was quite ordinary which made it ideal. The kids were fantastic after school as we ran about town. They got haircuts and we hit the grocery store--and, of course, the requisite drive through Starbucks (surely I am not wising up about the economy as we sip our raspberry cocoas!). The girls enjoyed making their own pizza and the three of us spent a peaceful and lovely evening together while dear Eric unfortunately had a grueling day at work. I was genuinely content. Drama and guilt free. Bliss.

After reading to Audrey I lay in her bed with my arms around her as I do each night and she told me she had three songs she wanted to sing to me. She crooned "Baa Baa Black Sheep", "Twinkle Twinkle Little Star" and then she belted out "Happy Birthday" (39 tomorrow!) My heart smiled.

She asked if she could stay home with me on my special day or if I could find a way to become her teacher for the day. "Just you and me. You teach and I will learn." (imagine that horror flick starring me as a home schooling mama?--yikes) She then went on to name her favorite teachers.

"If you taught you'd be my first then Miss Talona, Miss Corky, Mr. Bill... Actually you'd have to be second. God is my first teacher. I learn the most from Him."

Me too, girl.

My thoughts went back to reveling in how wonderful it feels to hug and hold her. I love her skin, hearing her breathe, her heart beating against mine as we lay in the dark. I crave being next to Olivia and Audrey when I am apart from them. There are times I literally ache to be near them. I love that feeling.

Moments later in Liv's room she asked if she could put on a show for me. "Not much time, hot stuff," I told her. "But show me what you've got."

"Five, Six, Seven, Eight! OMG have you seen my mom? She totally rocks. I am the luckiest kid on the block," and she danced about the room.

There I sat--- drinking it in.

And then I vowed to remind myself daily I have more than enough for my needs.

Mama Meltdown

The kids have been off from school for two days (again). Yesterday after a bit of a stir crazy morning and one that I "thought" I could juggle some work and some parenting I finally relented and packed the kids up (along with Audrey's doll pram) and we set off on an adventure.


It all started out beautifully.


A walk in Lake Forest Park.





A visit to Starbucks.

A stop at the book store.

As all these lovely bonding moments were taking place my phone was ringing, email inbox filling up and text messages pouring in.

I had told the painter earlier in the day that I would meet him at 2 p.m.


I told a potential new client I would call him at 3 p.m.


I had to return a client call about a new project that would happen late in the day.


Once my girls outing was done I planned to switch hats and make it all happen.


Wishful thinking.

The client phoned a couple times about an issue that I was already frustrated about (she wants a project done and the person I am contracting with to shoot the video for it has jacked his rates up by $1500--clearly I needed a quite period to discuss this with him and then with the client).


The potential new client was ready to deliver a check straight away in hopes that I would begin his media relations asap so after three emails in a matter of minutes my blood started to boil considering I pitched him about the project last FEBRUARY.

The painter's text messages told me he was waiting outside my house. 45 minutes early!

So I told the girls we had to leave the bookstore. IMMEDIATELY.

Liv wanted to read me "one more poem from Where the Sidewalk Ends" and Audrey must have had 20 books that needed to be put away.

As I listened to Olivia read and struggled to find the locations from where Audrey took the books I started to lose it (as the noise in my head grew louder).

We made it onto the sidewalk and then it happened. Audrey innocently ran in to the back of my ankles with her doll carriage.

And Mama snapped.

I scooped up the doll stroller and lectured the girls about being more careful, walking faster, listening to me when I needed them to, taking out one book at a time, and on and on. It was a bunch of nonsense that made Audrey cry and Liv look totally and utterly defeated.

Now I really had something to be overwhelmed about. I was a horrible mother.

I spent the rest of the day apologizing with a pit in my stomach and a bruise on my heart.

Why didn't I just tell the painter he was early and I would be there at 2? like I initially said

Why didn't I tell the new client (he did show up with the check THANK GOD) that he could wait another day? afterall it had been nine months

Why didn't I simply tell the photographer to draft a proposal explaining why we would want to pay him 3X his normal rate and then I would submit it?

Why was I taking this all on at the cost of my children?

Truth be told it was the snowball effect.

I wanted to meet the painter as he was rehanging all the curtains and peg racks and shelving in the girls rooms. I know how much Eric hates to do it and I was trying to make it just right. I started to resent that Eric couldn't just get it done and so I had to manage it and mess up my day.

As for the new client deal I thought about how beggars can't be choosers and in this economy a new account is a gift so I needed to make myself available.

As for the photographer---I resented that I had to act as his agent when this was money HE wanted.

At bedtime I continued to grovel to my girls. As she played with my hair Liv said, "I already forgot about it, Mom. You're forgiven. You rock. You would be so ugly if your hair was like this." Seems like things were back to normal.

In Audrey's room I apologized to her and she said, "Remember at church yesterday my Sunday school teacher said I had a heart like God? I will share some of it with you. It's all OK now, Mama."

And perhaps the biggest lesson? The next time I embark on an adventure with my girls I'll leave my PDA in the car.

Crushing

Olivia has a crush on a boy in her class. He admittedly likes her as well. So much so that he told me about it on a field trip a while back. I was amazed at the candor.

It's very harmless (thank God) as they are only 8. Neither of them gushes about one another but again they are both very clear and honest to their peers and their parents that they like eachother.

In the car en route to school today I asked her why she liked him.

He's smart

How?

He uses big words and reads books like Harry Potter. When we do our timed math tests and have to get 20 answers correct in one minute, he gets about 40 correct.

He's creative

How?

Did you see his name tag? It has a lot of fish and underwater sea life pictures that he drew on it.

He's talented

How?

He is great at a lot of sports. I've seen him play soccer and basketball and remember this summer I went over to his house and saw him swim?

He's funny

How?

He pretends he's a beaver pushing a lawn mower. He acts out what it's like to ride up and then go down on a roller coaster.

So why do you like him better than the other boys in school?

They think they're "all that". And they're not. But Joel is.

Victory

My presidential candidate won the presidency tonite. I am elated. Our Obama logo pumpkin is lit and my girls (and girl dog) are all wearing medals to celebrate.
It's been a long eight years.

I think my Olivia best illustrates how today feels to many.

It's been a banner day for her. Her third grade teacher, Miss Moe, announced at the end of the school day that she "did awesome". Her 8: 20 a.m. choir teacher and 3:30 piano teacher, Mrs. Bell, said, "she's really getting there and is very gifted". Her gymnastics coach, Randy, granted her the most stamps out of eleven gymnasts tonite (24 in total) and named her the the only Otter Pop recipient. So when I announced to her at the end of gymnastics class that Barack Obama was named the President of the United States Olivia declared today the greatest day of her life.

It surely is a probably the fourth greatest of mine. The birth of Liv, Audrey, and my marriage to Eric top it but today is monumental indeed.

Audrey and I took a walk tonite as the election results rolled in and Olivia tumbled at gymnastics. Audrey looked up at the brilliant sky filled with stars and said, "I think it spells Barack". Seriously.

Later in the evening Olivia heard him give his acceptance speech and announced, "He should be a pastor." Amen, sister.

Let me first say three Obama-rama cocktails created by my client, The Pink Door, and served by beloved friend, Darren, have made tonite even more brilliant (thank you, dear, dear D!)

Audrey and I danced as the results poured in.

Even Frib won my affections (which is HUGE after he ruined Liv's bedding yesterday if you recall from an earlier post).

Yet as soon as the presidency was announced (and before the Obama-ramas were poured) I played this song for my girls "I Hope" by Dixie Chicks. Lyrics below, song here. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0Q6PK0hOuNs

Later on this evening and admittedly way past bedtime I sent them off to bed with my Itunes blaring and the song "I Hope" playing once again. Audrey drifted off to sleep and Olivia lay calculating when she could vote. "In just ten years, Mama, I can vote. I can't wait."

I Hope Lyrics by Dixie Chicks

Sunday morning, I heard the preacher say

Thou shall not kill

I don't wanna, hear nothin' else, about killin'

And that it's God's willCuz our children are watching us

They put their trust in us

They're gonna be like us

So let's learn from our history

And do it differently

CHORUS:I hope

For love, joy and laughter

I hope

We'll have more than we'll ever need

I hope

We'll have more happy ever afters

I hope

We can all live more fearlessly

And we can lose all the pain and misery

I hope, I hope

Oh Rosie, her man he gets too rough

And all she can say, is he's a good man

He don't mean no harm

He was just brought up that way

But our children are watching us

They put their trust in us

They're gonna be like us

It's okay for us to disagree

We can work it out lovingly

For I hope

For love, joy and laughter

I hope

You'll have more than you'll ever need

I hope

You'll have more happy ever afters

I hope

And you can all live more fearlessly

And you can lose all your pain and misery

I hope, I hope

There must be a way to change what's going on

No, I don't have all the answers, butI hope

For more love, more joy and laughter

I hopeyou'll have more than you'll ever need

I hope

There'll be more happy ever afters

I hope

We can all live more fearlessly

And we can lose all the pain and misery, we can lose all the pain and misery

I hope, I hope

Gems

Here is Audrey this weekend decked out in some of my "real" and vintage jewels. She rummaged through my jewelry box and selected a few of her favorite pieces to wear.

I have a necklace with a locket that Eric gave me. The locket holds an apple seed and a bb inside it (Olivia was the size of an apple seed when I found out I was pregnant with her and Audrey the size of a bb). I let Audrey wear it. In a state of panic she ran through the screen door sobbing that she had lost it and how could I forgive her. Thankfully, she had not lost it (it was simply tucked underneath her dress and hidden behind another necklace).

How thoughtful she was with something I really value. As I held her I explained how far more precious she is than jewelry. I told her that even if she had lost it while I would be sad it would not be so awful afterall. "How about I take it off anyway?," she asked. I unclasped that necklace in a heartbeat!

We were out with friends a couple of nights this weekend (visitors and birthday celebrations- great fun!) and so on Saturday night we came home to find letters from Liv on the kitchen table.

She wrote to me that she'd been wishing on a star that I'd come home safely. She also wrote, When I am your age I'm going to do exactly what you do. (yikes) ;)

She went on, I want to be like you. I hope I will say "I am proud for being me" just like you should do, Mama.

With Olivia's eloquence, Audrey's honesty, and both their genuine spirits I am proud indeed-- of them.

A Star Was Born

Olivia Bliss turned eight on August 25. She said it was the best birthday of her life. All eight years of it. I was thrilled for her. For her party she and five other little beauties hit the mall for makeovers at Libby Lu. They all got to strike poses



and cheer for Olivia!



Then it was off to Red Robin for lunch



and ice cream sundaes all around!

Her actual birthday on Monday was spent enjoying the ritualistic birthday breakfast of ice creamhitting the city--we "Rode the Ducks" this year for the first time (plus, Gramma was in town so it was a treat for her)

and we wound down the day with a mint chocolate chip ice cream cake.

At bedtime Eric and I regaled Olivia with stories of her birth and tales of all the months and weeks and days and hours and minutes we waited for her. We told her what a twinkle she was in her father's eye before she was born and what a star she became in our world the moment we laid eyes on her. We told her how we love to bask in her glow and wished her a lifetime of shining brightly. And then Eric sang her the song she asks him to sing each night, "Yellow" by Coldplay. As he sang, "Look at the stars, look how they shine for you..." I listened and most of all --I heard. And I thanked God for Olivia, my star.

Liv. Love. Rock.

Olivia told me in light of all the presidential election buzz that she has a slogan for herself- Liv, Love, Rock. "It's what I am all about," she informed me.

Liv

She's a third grade drama queen. Olivia is all about never ending bursts of exuberant energy, dance moves, and all things Disney Channel (young talent, a lot of sass, and a marketer's dream). She spends her days tumbling, hip hopping, cheerleading, dancing, and composing songs. She embraces a challenge and maneuvers through life soaring brilliantly to the highest mountaintops and crashing hard in the deep valleys. Liv lives.

Love

When the day is done and Olivia finally allows her body and mind to rest-- her heart swells. Each night Eric or I (and often times both of us) massage her tired and sore little hands and feet. It is there in the dark when we hear her heartbeat as she tells us how happy she is, how much she loves us and God, how much fun her friends are, how cool her coaches are, how nice her teacher is, how much she misses her grandparents and cousins and her dear friend, Amanda. And how grateful she is for her little sister, Audrey. Liv loves.

Rock

Music fuels Olivia. If Jonas Brothers are not on her CD player or Disney radio is not coming from the car stereo or Nirvana or Frank Zappa is not playing out of iTunes on the computer then she is making her own music- either crooning the latest Demi Lovato song or composing one of her own in her journal. Liv rocks.

I agree with Olivia; her slogan is perfect for her.

She gets my vote.

Charm School

Olivia is "Star of the Week" this week. She asked if she could bring in sweet old Alice the dog. Of course, we told her. As someone who tries to cheer for the underdog I suggested she bring in Fribble as well. Eric reminded me of what a buffoon he is and what an awful idea that was. I told him if Frib got annoying I would put him back in the car.

Here is little Al sitting quietly and basking in the second graders attention.

Here was Frib lying next to me like the regal prince I was rooting for...

Zen Gardens & Jackie Robinson

Upon picking Audrey up from her Montessori class the other afternoon she told me to please not speak to her just yet as she was going to a peaceful place and could not yet be disturbed. She was using a delicate little rake and forming patterns in pure white sand inside a small wooden box. She used the rake to make zig zags and circles around smooth stones. She later explained to me that she was concentrating on, "finding a happy place in her mind after a stressful recess". Thankfully, her time in the Zen Garden worked.

Today at school pick-up Olivia & Jewel happily bound into the car and announced whom they were "playing" in the second grade's biography project. Jewel is Pocahontas and Olivia---Jackie Robinson-- the first African American Major League baseball player. "He played for the Brooklyn Dodgers, went to UCLA & was a big supporter of Martin Luther King Jr.," she explained. "How long have you been studying him?" I asked her wildly impressed. "I just chose him this afternoon," she replied. She will be the President one day.

A dear, dear friend of nearly 20 years wrote today and shared some fabulous insight. She is a mentor to me and Eric in the world of parenting. Mom of 4, sister to 5, foster mom, special needs advocate, teacher, and on & on. She had some amazing wisdom that I believe we can all benefit from. Here is but a glimpse of it...

"We think as moms we are required to always know the right move, and we automatically take the blame when things aren't going smoothly. I remember feeling total SHOCK when I realized that we ALL feel that way...we all think the other moms have it together, and we should, too. But ask ANY mom and they will say the same thing...we all fly by the seat of our pants. And we ALL are guessing. and we ALL are helpless and overwhelmed. These critters don't come with an instruction book, but they EACH come with a whole big set of challenges...ones we have never encountered and have no idea how to fix....It is okay to be guessing. That is all we have. Sometimes we guess right, and sometimes not. Sometimes we have to retreat to our own safety net: working on the computer instead of reading one more children's book, or missing a practice to go for a glass of wine with a friend. You would be doing them a diservice if you always guessed right. Imagine the pressure that would put on them when they are moms!" Amen. And does she totally rock or what? Thanks, B, for the guidance and friendship.

And now I'm off to order a mini Zen Garden. Liv informed me I have to create the outfit for her to wear in the Living History Museum play when she stars as Jackie Robinson!

News for Now

How I have missed blogging! I updated my site with a new look and have not had time to enjoy it!









I have been buried all week creating Eric's 40th birthday gifts. In one case I had to find a designer to create one of the gifts and in the other case my dear friend, Carrie, assisted me in creating a gift of my own for him. The orders have been placed and I can't wait to present them to him. It has been a tiresome yet wonderful journey chronicling 40 years of Eric. What a beautiful baby, darling boy, cutie pie teen, and handsome man. I am so lucky! I felt drawn back in time as I looked at pictures of his childhood. Some of them showed pure joy and yet others I know were taken during times of pain that he experienced on many levels. I am so proud of the person he has become.









I have slacked a bit at work this week. Well, more than a bit. For that I feel guilty but not too much so. All will be well and it will get done. The world of PR definitely ebbs and flows...after 17 years in the world of media I am finally learning to roll with it.









Last weekend the girls and I visited a local farm where they make artisan cheeses. One of my restaurant clients has partnered with the owners as we're featuring their cheeses during the months of April and May. They have hundreds of goats, yaks, cows, and even a water buffalo. And it is breeding season. So much so that upon entering the barn the owner said, "Look, there--two new babies arriving!" Here was one of them.

I got to hold it mere minutes after birth. Sheer magic.

The two new goats were girls so I jokingly told Julie (the owner) that Olivia & Audrey would be perfect names- just like my girls.

So Wednesday morning when I met my client and Julie at the local NBC affiliate to do a TV segment there was Julie & baby girl goat, "Olivia!"

Speaking of Olivias, my Liv has had what she might dub some of the best news of her young life thus far. She was "invited" to go to pre-team at Cascade Elite Gymnastics Academy. After her league meet last week the team coach asked Eric and me if we'd consider sending Olivia to pre-team. We were clueless as to what that meant and frankly, why she would ask. While Olivia has lovely form and great strength she is certainly not the most focused, nor is she the most competitive but she certainly has passion for the sport. The coach explained that they seek kids who have innate talents and skills (precision, clean moves, strength that generally exceeds their age expectations, etc.) While we were excited for her, we were still a bit perplexed that she was invited at this stage (she will be the youngest in the next pre-team class). We wondered, "Was it a money maker for them?", "Are the other classes too full so they simply move kids up?", "Do all kids eventually get invited and only some make it?" I contacted three coaches, I spoke to a 16 year old on team and a 21 year old who was on team from ages 8-18. I even cornered a mom at Target who has a daughter on team. Finally one of the coaches put it to me like this, "We have 320+ kids in our league and rec sessions right now and only 8 of them have been invited to go to pre-team. It's a real honor for the kids." I got it. "I can't believe I've been asked to go to pre-team, Mama!" Olivia must say this two dozen times a day (at least). I can only equate her joy with what I felt when I was pregnant with her. Each morning I woke up with a renewed lease on life knowing I was carrying a baby. It was thrilling and a great journey. I can't wait to watch hers unfold. I am so proud of her.







Her behavior has also been fabulous--we hit the one month mark of being tantrum free and learning how to hold it together better. Her reward was black Converse sneakers. How my baby girl who once wore matching bloomers and baby doll tops has grown...





Audrey has been reveling in "Earth Day" all week. Her teacher asked for flowers to plant in their school garden- Audrey brought in one for the garden and one for indoors. For "show & tell" she needed to bring something made out of wood so she chose an antique doll cradle my mom had bought the girls and prepared her baby dolls for nature camp. Here they are all tucked in underneath my baby blanket--nearly 40 years old!





I must run now--sun is shining, birds are singing, girls are awake and it's Saturday--much to do.