Friday, February 4, 2011

Finding Bliss

This photo of my Olivia just popped up in the corner of my laptop as I was working. It was snapped right after she got her stage makeup on for her role in "Annie". I first noticed her natural beauty and then was drawn once again to her eyes. I often wonder what goes on behind them.  She has taken in the world and analyzed it deeply since she graced our planet. She would lay in her cradle with her giant blue eyes always carefully watching the bustling activity around her. She would sit in her car seat gazing out at the window as the world whirled by. I could almost hear the wheels of her mind churning. She has never missed a beat. She soaks everything in. She did not smile easily- not until she thought she had the scene all figured out. Then her smile would come. And her giant belly laugh. And she felt secure.

Her report card came yesterday. She is excelling across the board. She is exceeding standards by leaps and bounds. The only area of concern is in her sense of self. Self esteem. 

Olivia is full of life. She is bright, pretty, gentle with children, growing more empathetic than I could have ever dreamed, thoughtful, witty, silly, talented, a risk taker, a dreamer, a storyteller, & as dramatic as the day is long.

So why the low self esteem? It makes no sense to me. A 10 year old such as Liv should feel as if she has the world on a string. I spoke to her about this and we're working through whether these are simple normal tween feelings or if maybe she tends to make normal feelings bigger than they really are or whether she really, really does feel bad about who she is. She promises me she has it under control. I told her that I am here for her, and her dad, and her family, and teachers, and principal, and prayer helps. She says she's got it. 

I sure hope so because Lord knows this child was made to shine.


Carolyn said...

Oh Katie, what a beautiful post. (Definitely one for the annual blog book for sure!)

Olivia is blossoming into a beautiful young lady. I'm not buying the lack of self esteem though and I think it's a shame it was a character trait they highlighted in her report card (self-fulfilling prophecy and all that..) Ironically, just recently I had the sense that Bliss was coming into her own; growing into her skin confidently and her star shining more brightly; and her new school family at Brighton was really helping to support this.

I hope she knows how much we love her and are proud of all she has achieved at Brighton. She has worked hard and diligently and it is all coming together - self esteem and all..

Keeping shining Liv love..

Katie said...

You are so thoughtful to take the time to write and share your thoughts. I know Liv feels loved by you and I so appreciate your friendship. blessings, dear Car.