Someday

Often times during the day I pop in to my girls rooms to tidy up, (or perhaps to steal a Halloween candy), or even simply to soak in the sunshine that pours into Audrey's room. It is a favorite resting space for the dogs, too, who are always at my feet.

Each time I feel myself pining for my girls who are off at school. I want to turn back time and sit on the floor with them --and read--and giggle- and play dolls. I want to sit at the foot of their beds and chat about their lives, hopes, dreams, desires, and loves. I want to paint their nails and dance about the room and belly laugh until our sides ache.

I have been told I live in a fairytale world at times. I completely agree. I love the idea of all the things an "ideal mama" is "supposed" to do and while some of the things I do really well there are many others where I fall very very short. Daily.

I have a sharp tongue and high expectations and impatient ways and there is so much I wish I could do over when it comes to how I am as a mother.

My hope is that someday when they stand in the quiet of their own children's rooms and experience the overwhelming sense of joy and pride and abiding love for them that they come to realize--- I can completely relate.