Olivia and Audrey and their posse of neighborhood divas have apparently mastered the art of communication. Who would have thunk all it took was to start each negative statement with "No offense" and then all would be well. Here's some examples of dialogues that happen across the monkey bars...
"No offense BUT your pants are too loose."
"No offense BUT your teeth are kind of yellow."
"No offense BUT when you don't get your way, you pout and we think you're spoiled."
And then they keep swinging across the bars or break into a game of Red Rover. Just. like. that.
The insults to each other's fashion sense, hygiene, and surly dispositions don't phase them. huh?
Last night as Liv and I were scouring the American Girl catalogue for the perfect holiday outfit for her doll, Emily, Audrey enters the room announcing she is a "Fashion Girl." She had plastered her eyelids~ well, not eyelids.. actually just one eyelid. She had coated her right eyelid over and over and over with pink eye shadow. She'd shellacked her lips with the sticky pink gloss from Libby Lu for what looked like some 50 times and she thought she was stylin'! Liv looked up from her catalogue browsing and announced, "No offense, you look like a clown."
And Audrey skipped off to show her papa.
So this morning Audrey got dressed in jeans, a cowgirl hat, and pink suede boots. In a Southern drawl she announced she was a Texas cowgirl.
"No offense, you look like a farmer with eskimo boots," said Liv.
Truth be told, Audrey did start crying just after this picture was snapped but it was not for the farmer comment. It was for the bunny ears. Of course.
Completely unphased that Audrey's feelings are hurt over the bunny ears, Liv announced she sees herself as a cross between Ashley Tisdale of HS Musical fame and Miley Cyrus (Hannah Montana.)
"No offense, you look more like Mr. Bean," said her kid sister.
Mr. Bean: British actor.comedian-Rowan AtkinsonAnd without missing a beat Liv breaks into a near perfect Mr. Bean impersonation. No offense taken whatsoever.
Posts
12 comments:
For what it's worth, Olivia does the finest Mr. Bean impersonation I've ever seen. Pictue a 7 year old girl doing this in a Hannah Montana wig:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4moPhSeDWFI
Love your Blog. “Blogging” is so you! I think God created the Blog for Katie Brown Wilkinson.
E~
That video is classic and EXACTLY how Olivia does it. I belly laughed watching the entire segment here alone in my office! I will have to ask her to do it again after school. Classic. Thanks for the link. Love you tons. k
Love it! Know that I am reading (and relating!) Sheila
No offense BUT I think Mr. Bean gives my fellow countrymen a bad name. As it happens we are truly *awesome* dancers....
;-)
This was hysterical... You made me laugh out loud with some of those one-liners from your sweet peaches!
Meanwhile, I'm tapping my feet waiting on more witty prose from you!!
I love you dear Carrie and when I figure all this blogging bit out I will link to yours. Your entry today was lovely. brilliant. God bless. k
Your girls are too much. Really, they will be stars some day. Not sure in which way, but watch out world... :)
Your girls are too much. A little like their mom & dad??? Naaa. They will be stars someday... watch out world ;) Jj
Ok, I am not a slalker. But this site makes me confused. I tried to post one & then it kicked me off. I tried again & as I looked over the comments- there I am: TWICE! Like a stalker. I am now done. Really. Sorry...
Stalk away, Jaime-Jaim. Flattered at the views! ;) Thanks for the kind words. I so appreciate your friendhship and happy 3-0, girlfriend! You've never looked better! God bless you! ox, k
i've been going back to your blog since the Sunday the 4th posts, and hadn't found any more entries. i've been thinking, "poor Katie, so busy with work and kids, she doesn't have time to blog."
today i find that my link brings me to your oldest blog but there are OTHERS i haven't read!
so i am having so much fun reading and i apologize for not being among the other commentators (if that's what people who comment are called).
this is priceless. you capture perfectly the self satisfaction of a confident 7 year old and the innocent joie de vivre of the 4 year old.
your family is wonderful. you are wonderful. i wish i lived closer!
with love -- aunt cyn
Post a Comment